The Rain
by Raksha Antares
Summary: Misao is going through days where she isn't quite herself. What could be causing this? Just Read & Review!
1. Rainy Day

It was the rain.

It had to be.

Nothing else could put me in a gloomy mood faster then a grey day.

Okon and Omasu had tried cheering me up earlier, to no avail. It was just one of my days. Ever since Aoshi had returned I'd been having days like this. Hot, humid days of nothing but grey sheets of rain.

I used to love the rain, the days Aoshi-sama and the Oniwabanshu would finally rest. Training would be shorted or forgotten. Han'nya would take off his mask, with the protecting walls of the Aoi-ya and play with me. Sometimes I feel that I remember him, and the others. And sometimes they feel like fragments of a dream. Dreams where they are telling me stories about heros and brave ninja fighting off evil. Making me toys out of bamboo. Training with me. They did so much for me. Most of all Aoshi, he would sit on the floor with me. He always asked what I wanted back then. Like my happiness was his only concern. It isn't that way anymore.

I haven't gotten anything I've wanted as of late. I wanted the summer storms to pass, and they only seem to be growing fiercer by the moment. Aoshi doesn't stay inside to be with me anymore. Why would he?

I rolled onto my stomach, shaking my head. It's like a curse, the rain. The small window that overlooks the busy Kyoto street was slightly fogged with the heat and the rain. I could still see a good section of the deserted street, puddles forming around the edges. I push my face into my pillow, and I curled into a ball and tried to block out the sound of rain bouncing on the roof.

The sound seemed to penetrate my mind. The more I tried to block it out the louder in became. Louder, and harder against my very soul. I-

"Misao."

The rain seemed to let up slightly, still present, but much less of a nuisance. The voice seemed to have suddenly soothed my breathing. I felt as if I was floating-

"Misao?"

My eyes snapped open as the shoji screen slid ajar. Aoshi was standing in the hallway, looking very uncomfortable. I sat up slowly, feeling slightly lightheaded.

"Yes, Aoshi-sama?" I asked politely, rubbing at my temples trying to wake up.

"Okina sent me to fetch you for dinner." He mumbled, in his low, calm voice. When I just simply stared at him he continued, "There were no customers because of the rain. Okina decided to have a dinner with everyone together." He explained further.

I nodded, not realizing until that moment that I hadn't eaten all day. I stood up, and suddenly blood rushed to my head and I felt myself grow dizzy.

I closed my eyes and waited for the feeling to pass, pressing my hand against the side of my head. The feeling passed in a few moments and I opened my eyes, somewhat shocked to be staring at Aoshi's big chest, he stared down his nose at me. Making me feel smaller the I already am.

An awkward silence passes and I notice how close he is to me. I can feel his body heat radiating off of him. I can hear his soft breathing. I look down, slightly embarrassed; and see his hand coming towards mine. I see his hand coming, but it doesn't quite register. And when he touches my hand, I feel an instant heat,. It surprises me how I never noticed how cold my own hands were until I was touched by his.

"Are you okay now, Misao?" He questions, his blue eyes seem to soften slightly, and I notice his hand is still hot, locked onto mine.

"I'm okay Aoshi-sama, I just fell asleep is all." I mumbled, slightly hypnotized by his scent flooding my senses. I look up, and his lips were only a few inches away. My mind was racing, should I try to kiss-

He made the decision for me, backing away quickly; his eyes back to their icy cold stare as he leaves. Sliding the shoji door closed as he exits. I breathe normally for the first time in at least two minutes. I can feel my heart beating, it feels like a bird is trapped in my chest.

I fall back onto my bed, still slightly glum, but as the rain pounded even harder above my head; I raised my hand to my cheek. And I could still feel the warmth from his palm.


	2. The Cut

I walked downstairs a few minutes later to find everyone seated around a table. Okon and Omasu glanced at me nervously before resuming their conversations. Distant thunder rumbled in the distance and everyone briefly glanced at the window facing the woods. I sat between Kuro and Jiya, who was sitting at the head of the table. Aoshi was directly across from me.

My plate had already been made for me. I picked up my chopsticks and pushed my food around on the plate. My mind drifted from conversation to conversation going on around me. Shiro and Kuro discussing food. Okon and Omasu giggling about a suitor. I drift in and out of their conversations while still hearing the rain hit the roof. I peered out the window, watching the rain obscure the window, making the trees look as if they're melting-

"Misao-chan.."I heard from my side, blending in with the sound of the storm. It really did look as if the trees were melting-

"MISAO!" Jiya bellowed as my gaze snapped from the window to a frustrated looking Jiya. "Do you know how long I've been trying to get your attention? What is wrong with you?!" He asked as he stared at me. Everyone else was staring. Even Aoshi-sama. Everyone had clean plates. Except me. I felt the heat raising in my face, embarresed and annoyed.

"WHAT are you all staring at!? I just spaced out- Is that a CRIME?!" I screamed as Okon, Omasu, Shiro, and Kuro all excused themselves at once. It was bad enough having Jiya yell, but Jiya and I yelling? That nearly broke the sound barrier.

I looked from Jiya to Aoshi, and then back to Jiya.

"Misao, I would like to talk to you about tomorrow." Jiya simply stated, wiping his mouth with a napkin.

Tomorrow, my eighteenth birthday. With all of the rain I had forgotten to count down the days like I normally do. Eighteen, wow. I didn't feel that old.

"Okon and Omasu would like to have a small party here tomorrow night. Would that be okay with you?" Jiya asked, looking me straight in the eye.

As soon as I heard that I felt a pang of guilt in my chest. Okon and Omasu had been so kind to me recently, they knew the rain depressed me. And they went out of their way to be nice, and what do I do to thank them? Mope around a pitch fits at the dinner table. I took a deep breath getting my thoughts together.

"That sounds great Jiya. I just haven't been myself lately," I said softly as Jiya nodded, wanting me to continue. "I, um- just haven't been sleeping well. I was actually asleep before dinner," I lied hastily, feeling suddenly guilty for giving Jiya a half-truth.

"Is that right?" Jiya asked, staring at me and stroking his beard. God, it was like he could see through me.

"Uh- Yeah! Ask Aoshi-sama, I was sleeping when he came to fetch me for dinner." I muttered quickly, looking at Jiya. Jiya looked to Aoshi-sama. Realizing it was his turn to speak Aoshi-sama looked me straight in the eye, his eyes so intense I was surprised I hadn't been pushed backwards by the force of them.

"Yes." he whispered, breaking eye contact with me and sipping at his tea. How typical.

Jiya seemed satisfied, he stood and started collecting everyone's disguarded plates. I stood up quickly, hitting my hip against the table.

"SON OF A- Ugh, Jiya! I'll do the dishes." I exclaimed, rubbing my sore hip. I gathered the plates from his hands and filled the sink with warm water and soap. I still felt guilty for lying to him, and I decided the dishes was the least I could do. Okina just stood there staring at me as Aoshi kept his eyes downcast.

"Well it seems our little Misao is growing up." Jiya commented as I started scrubbing a knife that had been used to make dinner tonight. I chose to ignore Jiya's comment, and I heard him leave a moment later.

I scrubbed the plates from dinner quietly after Jiya left. The rain had died down considerably, it was now only a light drizzle. The rain, even as light as it was, seemed so loud in the room. Aoshi was still sitting at the table behind me, but remained silent. (Imagine that) The tension seemed to be mounting with every passing moment of silence. I tried to concentrate on scrubbing a soiled plate until it shined.

I reached into the sudsy water, feeling around for another dish to clean, when suddenly a pain shot through my hand. The pain seemed to send a shockwave through my whole body, it stung so badly. I yelped and whipped my hand out of the sink, clutching it against my chest.

Aoshi was beside me before I had even cried out. He touched my shoulder and whispered in my ear;

"Let me see your hand." He mumbled as I held my hand out for him to examine without hesitation. I wanted him to make it all better. He looked at my slashed palm, the gash large but not deep. A mixture of water and blood dripped off my hand, and I could feel the soap from the water stinging my ripped skin. I grimaced.

Aoshi stood, still holding my wrist. He walked me silently to the hallway that led me to his bedroom. He let go of my wrist at the doorway, walking to his futon and pulling some bandages and ointment from under the futon.

I just stood in the doorway unsure if he wanted me to come in his room or not. He was kneeling by the futon, he turned his head, face expressionless.

"Misao, you're dripping." He said calmly and I looked down and saw a few more drops of my blood land in a small puddle at my feet. I quickly walked to Aoshi as he unrolled some bandages. He motioned at me to sit on the futon, his futon. When he wasn't training he was here. I felt heat rush to my face, and I sat in front of him on the futon before another dizzy spell got to my head.

I watched as Aoshi gently dipped his finger in the ointment and spread it across the cut on my palm. I clenched my teeth as the cold goo stung my hand. Aoshi looked up momentarily. I nodded and his eyes dropped back down to continue.

As he wrapped my hand I tried to remember how many times he'd wrapped my hand before. How many times I'd hurt myself when I was a child. Scrapes, burns, cuts and rashes. Aoshi had made them all better.

The rain was so soft overhead, I started to remember a specific incident where I'd hurt myself. Aoshi looked up and I couldn't help but smile.

"Aoshi-sama? Do you remember when I was about seven and I cut my fingers while training? I started wailing and screaming about how I was going to die. And Han'nya couldn't calm me down? So he carried me to you and you were able to calm me down. Do you remember that?" I asked excited, looking at Aoshi. It wasn't until I looked in his eyes then I realized my mistake. I had mentioned Han'nya.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to men- " I started before he brought a gentle callused finger to my mouth. It was then when I realized how close he was to my face. And there I was on his futon.

"It's okay Misao. I just didn't know you remembered them that vividly." He said, removing his finger from my lips. My lips instantly felt cold, with his finger gone.

I felt slightly angered by his statement. And I scowled at him.

"Of corse I remember them Aoshi-sama. Little things. Not their faces but their patience for me and training with Han'nya," I sighed looking at his eyes. "Why do you keep them to yourself?" I asked him boldly, my voice slightly elevated. "You could speak about them with me. You aren't the only one who misses them Aoshi-sama!" I scolded, looking up at Aoshi-sama. As soon as I saw his face I realized I'd gone too far. He closed his lips, his mouth making it the usual straight line.

Aoshi stood and turned from me, shoulders tense. He turned towards the window, his silhouette looked so large against the dark window.

'Damn, why can't I ever say what I mean without hurting him. He starts to open up, and I ruin it!' I thought to myself as I sighed, trying to think of what to say next. I opened my mouth to apologize when he beat me to it.

"Would you like to visit them Misao? Han'nya, Shikijo, Hyottko, and Beshimi?" Aoshi asked, his voice strong and louder then usual. I stood up from the futon, shocked. Was he serious? Did he realize what this meant to me?

"Aoshi-sama." I mumbled, breathless,

"Yes or no Misao?" he demanded, voice cold.

"Yes." I replied, feeling dizzy like I had earlier. But in a good way. Aoshi-sama would let me visit them. I had always hoped-

"Fine, go get ready. We leave in ten minutes." He said, his voice back to it's normal tone.

"Thank you Aoshi-sama." I whispered, just loud enough for him to hear as I rushed out to prepare.


End file.
